MYSTRO The...

UPCOMING:

FEB 2022: 

Mystro LIVE - Comedy at Howard Hughes AMC Theatre (Host Robbie P.) - LA

I still sling mics too. 😎. 

Check back for more details.

UPDATES: Jan 2022

  • New photos added
  • New Info added
  • New interviews added. 

More to come... and maybe a new comedy CD ??? 🤔

Comedy CD:
Live in Iraq; Jokes, Rockets and Bullets.
https://music.apple.com/us/album/live-in-iraq-jokes-rockets-and-bullets/929824436

SFB Comedy CD:
https://music.apple.com/us/album/sexy-funny-bastard/903603675

NEED A WRITER FOR YOUR TV OR FILM IDEA? Guess What ...

You found me. I am a professional writer with a Master's degree and many hours of writing, rewriting, and editing scripts. Whether it's a sitcom, one-hour dramas, or feature film I can write it in the proper Hollywood format with structure, story, and dialogue to turn your IDEA (thought) into a sellable SCRIPT (product). Face it, writing a good script is hard. After 27 years in Hollywood and working on numerous tv shows and films, I can tell you... A good idea is easy, but a good script is a product of hard work, practice, and talent.

I don't know if it takes 10,000 hours as Malcolm Gladwell said, but I know it does not happen overnight.  If you are serious about seeing your idea turned into a screenplay let me know. BUT, Before you ask - NO, I Do Not Work for Future Credit, Food, Sex, or exposure (I'm already exposed that's how you got here).

I work for money of course, and the results are yours. You get the script - I get written by credit and my fee. If you are serious and ready to go let's talk.

Mystro

100%

Mystro on. Quakes House on LOL Radio SiriusXM Ch.96.- Sex Ed episode - 1/11/22
Link:
https://player.siriusxm.com/on-demand-episodes/9469/c41fcc44-1a07-9b58-32d1-ec9f24a675f2/audio/page-name%3Dedp_episodes&showGuid%3Dc41fcc44-1a07-9b58-32d1-ec9f24a675f2

Mystro tells the dirt...

REACH AROUND RADIO - Mystro Interview 11.12

Throwback - The Train Line - Mystro

A SoulTrain Line appearance by the host. The100% :)

MYSTRO UPDATES:

Jan. 11, 2022

FREE delivery on the comedy CD if you download it online! (congrats on reading the fine print)---**.

Jan. 11, 2022

Los Angeles County hits 2 million coronavirus cases

Be careful. This shit is no joke and doing "research" on Youtube is a joke. That's why medical school still takes 4 years AFTER college. Facts! MC100
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Los Angeles County has reached another milestone in the pandemic: more than 2 million confirmed coronavirus cases.
The county reported 43,582 new cases Monday, with officials saying Omicron continues to spread with unprecedented speed. The positivity rate of those who get tested is 21.4%.
And even such large totals are probably an undercount as they don’t include many of those who may have self-diagnosed using an at-home test.
L.A. County described exceeding the 2 million mark as a “grim milestone.” Last week, the county saw more than 250,000 cases in a seven-day period and warned this week of more rapid spread.
----
JAN. 11, 2022 8:33 AM PT
by BY LUKE MONEY, GREGORY YEE , RONG-GONG LIN II

Link:
https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2022-01-11/los-angeles-county-hits-2-million-coronavirus-cases

Jan. 10, 2022

Check me out on Quake's House, LOL Radio: Ch96-SiriusXM 1/11/22

Uncle Mystro dropped 100% Knowledge in a rare appearance with some other funny friends on Earthquake's hit radio show on Kevin Hart's LOL Radio Channel.
Check it out. Rated R for "Grown Folks Talkin"

Link:
https://player.siriusxm.com/on-demand-episodes/9469/c41fcc44-1a07-9b58-32d1-ec9f24a675f2/audio/page-name%3Dedp_episodes&showGuid%3Dc41fcc44-1a07-9b58-32d1-ec9f24a675f2

Jan. 11, 2022

Biden calls on Senate to change filibuster rules to pass voting rights bills in forceful speech: 'I'm tired of being quiet'

It's time to protect the right to vote for everybody. We cannot go backward, it's only been almost 56 years since we protected the right to vote, Damn! Facts. MC100
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The Voting Rights Act of 1965, signed into law by President Lyndon B. Johnson, aimed to overcome legal barriers at the state and local levels that prevented African Americans from exercising their right to vote as guaranteed under the 15th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. The Voting Rights Act is considered one of the most far-reaching pieces of civil rights legislation in U.S. history.
-----
Link:
https://www.history.com/topics/black-history/voting-rights-act

Link:
https://www.cnn.com/2022/01/11/politics/biden-atlanta-voting-rights-speech/index.html

Apr. 15, 2021

Sorry, I killed you? Cowboy Cops gotta go.

If you have been doing a job for 26 years and still don't know how to use your tools correctly under pressure, then you suck at your job. I suggest you get a new line of work. When did the police become such "cowardly Cowboys? " As a military officer, we are now allowed to accidentally shoot people even in a war zone. We could not shoot until shot at in most cases. Police officers are not gunslingers even though they want to be. If you want to be like Wyatt Earp you are about 150 years too late. He at least knew he was a public servant which is what police officers are. All the jungle camouflage and tactical gear in an urban setting may look tough but it's unnecessary. You WORK for the PUBLIC, ACT LIKE IT. You are not at war in a foreign country.

You are sworn to protect and serve Americans regardless of neighborhood or skin color. If you have never been in a minority neighborhood until you got assigned there for work, then you need classes on how to speak to people of color first. If you are so afraid around Black and Brown people that you can't function properly, then law enforcement is NOT THE JOB FOR YOU. It's okay. Just pick something else. Taco Bell is hiring. You are not the badass town marshall. If you're still that kid in the mirror that was bullied in elementary school, overlooked in high school, and now a scarred passive-aggressive adult, then embrace your reality and seek therapy. You are still afraid and angry just older.
Now you shoot people in the back for running away from you or keep your knee on someone's neck to feel powerful. It's a power trip. It's your inner coward seeking payback and feeling artificially brave behind a badge.

Ask yourself this - "what would I do if I did NOT have a gun?" - Now act accordingly. Some countries don't issue guns to their officers and still have less crime than the US. If you want to fight wars join the military if you want to fight people take up MMA if you want to be a police officer learn how to talk to all people of all colors with respect and keep your biases in check.
Learn to problem-solve before you learn to shoot. The gun is the tool of last resort. You can't shoot someone because you can't run fast enough to catch them. Maybe you should get in better shape, or better yet resign, retire, or just quit. Public service is not for everybody. It's hard. There are other jobs that don't require you to run fast or be afraid. Find one. The Foodservice industry is a stable, respectable career.

Jan. 19, 2021

COVID19 is on the loose- Stay Home and stop Whining.

US has over 350K DEAD. That's not a hoax it's a medical nightmare. CA is a hotspot with one in ten people being infected. It's A Pandemic people, that means it's everywhere. Don't be selfish just wear a mask, wash your hands, and STAY HOME. You can go to the beach later. We live in a society. It's time to do what's best for the group now. If you have not taken a science class since High School don't try to be an Immunologist now. You're NOT. This is not the time for amateurs..Google and FB does not count as "research". Laughter really is medicine, But we need a vaccine for this. Until then... it may not cure COVID19 but at least you won't be stressed about it.
Be safe.
"A crisis exposes weak leaders" as we say in the military.

Apr. 2, 2020

"Mystro re-releases comedy CD: "Live in Iraq Jokes, Rockets and Bullets"!

Mystro's second comedy CD; "Live From Iraq; Jokes Rockets and Bullets" Recorded LIVE while deployed in Iraq. - Not some USO visitor comedy tour shit, he's a real Soldier on deployment giving the real military perspective on love, war, sex, and life, 100% uncensored comedy.
Sorry, the sound isn't perfect but....we were in a fucking barracks! You want the real or not? This is it. The only way to get more real is to join the Army and deploy - Warning: You may get blown up. MC100%

BUY at iTunes.com:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/live-in-iraq-jokes-rockets/id929824436

Nov. 30, 2017

Dayton icon Jerry Gillotti, Gilly’s nightclub owner, dies

RIP Mr Gillotti. You were the first club owner to hire me as an opening act while I was still in college. Thank you for helping me believe in my talent. God bless. Mystro.

Performers booked at Gilly’s through the years include a host of local groups and a laundry list of national acts that include Tony Bennett, Diane Schuur, BB King, Wynton Marsalis, Art Blakey, Dexter Gordon, Bill Evans, George Benson, Herbie Hancock, Count Basie, Bobby Blue Bland and Stevie Ray Vaughn.

Jerry Gillotti “was one of a kind, really focused on supporting musicians, treating his customers fairly, and providing a quality level of jazz and blues beyond anything we could ever expect,”. “So many musicians owe so much to him.”

In his nomination of Jerry Gillotti to the Dayton Walk of Fame, Leppla said Gillotti became one of the greatest jazz and blues promoters in the United States. After a successful run on North Main Street, Jerry moved Gilly’s to the Dayton Transportation Center. In addition, Jerry hosted a Sunday morning jazz show for several years on WING-AM radio.

Heartfelt tributes to Mr. Gillotti have been posted on Facebook as well.

Welcome to the House of the 100%; Mr. Mystro Clark

Mystro Clark has been in the comedy game since 1989. If you have ever said "Keeping it 100" You're welcome! Mystro invented it in 1990! Literally!

He started in Dayton, Ohio, and moved to Los Angeles after earning a Bachelor's degree in Clinical Lab Science and doing his time in the Army. Mystro quickly got noticed at comedy clubs around the country for his powerful stage presence and clever routines which earned him three HBO appearances, his own BET One Hour Special, and the nickname “Mr. 100%”. Mystro has two comedy CDs: “Sexy, Funny, Bastard,” and “Live in Iraq: Jokes, Rockets and Bullets."

Mystro's comedy success led to numerous television shows and movies starting with his first weekly series, a sketch comedy show called The NEWZ, followed by his first starring role in a Fox sitcom, THE SHOW, where he played brash talk show host 'Wilson Lee".  That led to numerous development deals with Fox, Warner Brothers, and Disney Studios. Mystro has had featured roles in over 30 TV shows and comedy and dramatic roles in films such as Shrink with Robin Williams and Kevin Spacy. He has also written numerous projects. Mystro has an MFA in Screenwriting.

Next Mystro broke into hosting and was chosen as the weekly host of SOUL TRAIN when Don Cornelius retired. He hosted for 3 seasons before moving on to host the long-running weekly travel series AWESOME ADVENTURES, which he did for 10 seasons, traveling all over the world.

Mystro is also a spokesman, doing TV commercials for Animal Planet, and Taco Bell. He is also a talented voice actor with national PSA's and video games such as 'Men in Black.'

Mystro has produced music and comedy CDs. His "Sexy, Funny, Bastard" is a comedy favorite by fans on satellite radio. His latest release "Live In Iraq - Jokes, Rockets, and Bullets" was recorded in an Army barracks while he was deployed in Iraq as an Army officer. The realism and raw truth are what Mystro Clark fans expect from The 100%.

Mystro has built a career by staying true to his 100% mentality. It was no surprise when the combat veteran took a hiatus from entertainment to deploy to Iraq again with his Army unit. During his year in the warzone, he was inspired to do an impromptu barracks comedy show for his fellow Soldiers and Marines. That show turned into his latest comedy CD.

When asked why he left Hollywood to go to war, Mystro, a 20 year Army veteran, replied;

"I'm a real Soldier, I needed to refill my cup with some real-life sh-t, being in combat is a life and death experience, it makes you focus on what's important. Hollywood is a perception. I don't just talk about being “The 100%” I live it. That’s who I am.”

Mystro wrote a tv show based on his time in Iraq and how combat veterans struggle to reintegrate into life and issues back at home.

MYSTRO "Mr.100%" CLARK

 

2201

 

HBO Def Comedy Jam set #2- - "Sex with a strong woman"
by Mystro Clark "Mr 100%"

RIP Mr Gillotti, owner of Gillys in Dayton OH.
Thank you for helping me develop my talent.

You gotta get news somewhere besides Facebook..

Aug. 16, 2019

Stay strong Dayton - Another Mass Shooting, Again...keep the thoughts and prayers... do you job govt!

With more mass shootings than any civilized nation on earth, Our response is still "it's too soon to discuss gun laws". Thoughts and prayers are not actions...Just change the date.

Advice from a combat Vet:
"Just because you have a gun doesn't make you a gun fighter." MC100

300x More people have died from gun violence in America than terrorist acts. (facts don't lie)

It's Radio on the Internet: The Rollout Show w Speedy and Friends Thursdays 12-3pm

Catch me on The Rollout Show live w Speedy Thursdays 12-3pm. Listen and watch, its the future...

https://youtu.be/ELPbuiHj4Qw

Me and my old roommate, Chris, at his golf tournament.

Actor Resume

TELEVISION:

Studio 60 - Willy Wilz - NBC 

The Shield - Warner - FX

Kaya - L.A. - MTV

Lovespring International - Alex - Lifetime (series)

World Cup Comedy - Self (Improvisation) - PAX (series)

One on One - Red Galloway - UPN

That’s Life - Officer Johnson - CBS (series)

The Grown Ups - Neal - UPN

Pacific Blue - Self - USA

Cousin Skeeter (writer) - Coach - NICK

Keenen and Kel - Cousin E - NICK

Getting Personal - Graham - FOX

Rewind - Harv - FOX (series)

Gregory Hines Show - Doug - CBS

The SHOW - Wilson Lee - FOX (series)

Parenthood - Director Troy - WB

The NEWZ - Various (sketch) - FOX/synd. (series)

HOST:

Soul Train (97-2000) - Self - WGN/ Tribune (series)

Awesome Adventures (01-2011) - Self - FOX/ SRP/ synd. (series)

Golden Globe Awards (Red Carpet) - Self - E! Network

Emmy Awards Red Carpet - Self - E! Network

Pulled Over - Self - Style Network (series)

Slam Ball - Sideline Reporter /Self - Spike  (series)

FILM:

Shrink - Dr. Morton - Jonas Pate / Ind

Out at the Wedding - Alex - Goff-Kellam Prod/Ind

Storm Catcher - “Sparks” Johnson - Tony Hickox/ Phoenician

Chairman of the Board - Ty - Alex Zamm/ Trimark

White Men Can’t Jump - Supporting - 20th Cent FOX

THEATER:

The Last Days of Judas Iscariot (by Guirgis) - Pontius Pilate - Pismo, CA

COMEDY: (Stand up)

Comics Unleashed - Self - CBS/ Synd (multiple)

HBO Def Comedy Jam (3x) - Self - HBO (multiple)

BET Comic View (3x) 1 Hr Special - Self - BET (multiple)

Evening at the Improv - A&E

Comedy Loco - Telemundo

Aspen Comedy Festival - HBO

COMMERCIAL / VOICE:

Taco Bell - Manager - National TV

Two Guys Prenatal PSA- Basketball player 1- National Radio

Men In Black - Agent K (voice) - Video Game

 

TRAINING:

Advanced Acting / Screenwriting – Cosumnes River College

Acting / Scene Study - Theater of Arts, CA

Voice Acting - Kalmenson and Kalmenson, CA

Improvisation - LA Connection Theater, Studio City, CA

Character Study - The Approach (Tom Ardavany) Beverly Hills

Screenwritng - MFA

Medical Technology - BS

SKILLS:

Military, medical, martial arts, comedy, voice, sketch, host, improvisation.

ROLLOUT SHOW w Speedy n Friends, 07/19 (start at 41min)

Mystro enters at 41:00 min

https://youtu.be/ELPbuiHj4Qw?t=2464

Mystro trailer - The Powerhouse Mission

Sometimes a shortcut is the longest way home...

  • What I do - Make people laugh, think, relax, react.

    I have been in the comedy and acting hustle for over 20 years, I've served a large number of laughs worldwide on camera and in person.

  • Mail/Contact

    To get in touch with me just leave a message using the Contact page, and someone will get back to you. ... Sooner if it's about a booking.

  • Awards

    Respect is necessary, talent is required, but awards are like candy.. You don't need em but you like em..

Thanks for stopping by,

Mystro Clark